Campaign of the Month: December 2020

House Jasper

Viktor Chose Death.
Poor Tito

For those I respect most, I will always trust the hard choices they make. Viktor chose death. He did not mention it to anyone but me, but the melee was to be his last fight. I wasn't 100% sure he was serious, but I could understand with the Joyful Few massacred why he would feel he had nothing to live for. His men were his family, and without them he was lost. 

The melee was a fight to surrender, and with the onus being on Viktor to declare defeat, he never was going to give. That said, I cannot believe Maelys would do what he did. Aiming for a man's neck in a friendly fight is uncalled for. No one should have been attempting to kill their opponents in melee. This is also partially on him. He is the one who took Viktor's head off, and he bears some responsibility for his death.

Too many failures.....
...but I still have an eye and my crossbow...

I narrowly lost my life to those fools during the duel, Wyman and Willas. I had to convince the lord of the house to stop this insanity. Pleading for my life. PLEADING FOR MY LIFE!!!! How embarrassing….

Luckily, Lord Ronnal saw the logic in it, after having lost so many as a result of the ongoing war. He stopped the duel and saw to it that the Waters twins were paid some of my hard earned money as retribution. For some reason, I still have to pay for something that is not my fault. Even though I have no quarrel with the Water's twins, the next time they try to engage me, one of them is losing an eye. 

Aside from this, there is a little hope, apparently in my absence a competition to win the Master at Arms Position has arisen. A house contest to see who can score the most points. The Hunt, a grand melee, a joust, and a couple of marksmanship events in order to see who is the most gifted in all of the best qualities of the master at arms. Finally a chance to show my true skills of why Ronnal chose me in the first place. Unfortunately with me being away,  for what I am now calling "personal" reasons, I was behind as Carsen and Darron already bagged some points on the hunt. 

The axe/knife throw and archery competition were a piece of cake. It was nice to see Samwell look like a grumbling idiot at something for once. I easily swept both of these competitions. No surprise there. 

Although, the joust was a different story. Unfortunately, my limited expertise on a horse got me to the second round of the joust, but Darron is clearly the most skilled in this endeavor. I may have something to learn from this old drunk yet….

I write this journal a bit quickly as I am bit pressed for time to sleep and rest before the fight tomorrow, and I need as much rest as I can get especially if I am to defeat any of these knights of the house. Unfortunately, I will get no such rest as there's a knock at my door……



Down Little Doggy
Viiiiiiictoooory!!!! (FYI This is 2 weeks in the past)

He is lucky I covered for him. Silly Jardon getting himself in a fight to death with the Water's twins was dumb (and suicidal with his injuries). I don't blame him for no-showing, I too would choose life. I sold our Lord and the others on a story that he must have been abducted as his honor would not allow for anything else. The way I wove the words together, I almost convinced myself! Damn I'm good! 

Into this awkward void Lord Ronnel made his announcement: "A competition is to be had! A series of 5 events to determine who will be the next Master-of-Arms. The Bargest Hunt, Throwing,  Shooting, a Joust and a Melee. This is a prestigious position and you should all be trying your hardest for the good of yourself and the house. A series of events shall ensure the best man wins. *He looked right at me when he said this. Chance? I think not. He thinks os highly of me, but do I want this job?* Each will have points allotted for first second and third except for the hunt. For the hunt you will be in teams of two and only the victor's will receive points. You must slay the beast that has been harassing our small folk and bring proof back. The first team to do this wins the hunt. The teams are Perrin and Samwell, Tito and Viktor and The Knights; Ser's Carsen and Darron. Begin!" 

Darron and I made great haste to the knuckle, where the beast was said to be. Our craven competitors were afraid to fight the beast at knight and made camp, waiting for daylight. We hunted through the dark and found the creature. It whimpered at the site of our fearsome weapons, horses, and armor. It leapt at Darron, doing it's best impression of a gnat irritating a shadow cat. Darron returned the favor by striking it with his steely claw. I flung an arrow at the beast, deftly shooting around my companion. We made a sport of the hunt, with me changing over my weapons before going in for the kill. There is nothing like getting up close and personal with a feral beast! I swung my axe while seeing red (which may be why i missed my strike), and it startled the beast due to my ferocity. Using this window I pretended to throw my axe, but didn't (to distract it you see) the silly hound fell for it. Darren cleaved it with his sword and the fight was won!

While I enjoy a good competition and I want to look impressive for our lord, I do not want to be Master-of-Arms. I already have become a lord, a knight, and have a castle on the way as it is. It sounds purely like more work and no gain. I may need to throw a future competition if things are going too well… 

Also, Where the hell is Jardon?

A bender of sorts.....
A vision

At fault for Ardin Celtigar's death? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?! Wyman and Willas Waters are completely insane. Of course Samwell, taking advantage of the situation and just wanting to see me die, plays right into it. Yeah, they lost their father, an enemy of the Vale and to House Jasper, but I was busy trying to take down Jonothor Derry, I was no where near the fighting. I am not at my best and should not be fighting, but these two twerps need to be put out of their misery. I decide to fight the two of them. 

That night, I rest as well as I can, tossing and turning, and perhaps it was blood poisoning, or some type of sorcery, but I started to have a vision. I was an Eagle, and was clawing out the the eyes of a bear, a wound that killed the bear.

I woke up to pains in my side, when it subsided I lightly went back to sleep. I was then again in the body of an eagle but this time taking out the eyes of a septon. It was unclear whether this was actually wounding the priest, but I woke up before I could make sense of the situation in the dream. 

I tried to make sense of it all, but sadly could not. And what else do you do when you need to ponder a mysterious vision. In the famous words of Ser Darron, "Let's get a drink". Unfortunately, this was only said to myself such as it was……

I get up, gather my things, and my horse and head to the small fishing village where I grew up, Jasport (a not so witty name for where our battleships are kept). 

The next couple of days are a bit hazy. I was told by my mother, that I ended up in one of the taverns, The Drowning Man, near where the warships are docked. She was told by some of the towns folk that I started talking to myself at the bar. Some of the tavern regulars heard me talking to myself and decided it was too much and decided to lighten the atmosphere (I would have thought that meant getting me in a better mood, but apparently it meant throwing me out) I was dragged out by some of the townsfolk mumbling about eagles, bears, and even fish. It was all a bunch of banter. I was dropped, literally, in front of my mother's house. Drunk and passed out. 

She said I was out for about a day, she thought I may have been drugged, I'm pretty sure I just had too much to drink, as the headache was unbearable. 

I don't know what came over me, as when I returned to Snownook, I could not see the logic in any of my actions. Perhaps, I was just drowning in my failures and needed some time away to be reborn. 

And I raaaaaan, I ran so far awaaaaaaay
Into a flock of seagulls

Would I say that Dolins is guilty of bribing a Gold Cloak? Privately, yes. Could I develop a line of reason to say ‘No’? Of course. But I’m not interested in slapping horse-faced guards over the head with my ridiculous decrees of innocence while they keep us in a cage through a siege of the city, only to be ruthlessly murdered by the Mad King for impersonating a member of the Alchemist Order. I have higher aspirations.

As the guards move to apprehend Dolins and Thad, Calaila and I both instinctively turn and run. The gate commander sends four of his cloaks to chase us down, but they’ll have a hard time keeping up with all their battle armor!

Calaila immediately breaks for a tiny alley to the right. I followed her toward the alley because I want to stick together. She always has a plan, and she’s familiar with Kings Landing. But the first thing she does is try to squeeze into this tiny space between buildings. That plan wasn’t going to work for my physique, so I broke off and sprinted to find my own escape.

The cloaks in the intersection ahead of me are alerted to the pursuit… namely MY pursuit, since Miss Tiny-Ass crawled into the first hole she could find… Now there are SIX guards chasing me through the streets!

I’m able to lose several of them in the tight alleys, and I’m about to break into the clear when WHAM!!! One of the cloaks knocks me off my feet. I get up and put some space between us, but he throws his spear in my direction and makes contact! Lucky for me, ‘tis but a scratch.

I run back into the main corridor and look around. To my left, I catch a glimpse of Calaila calmly walking across the street and out of sight into another alley. How does she always get away like that? And the two guards who, I presume, let her walk away, see me and start to chase me! GAH!!!

In the open streets, the heavily armored guards are easily out-run. Having seen Calalia moving East, I also head that direction. I find a blockade of barrels and climb over them, safely eluding the guards.

A few more  blocks to the east, the streets open into a large space where Calaila and I find each other, and exchange looks of relief.

Nothing to prove and I'm bulletproof
know what I'm doing....

"ARREST THEM!" Without a second thought, my feet hit the pavement running away from the guards after Teddy and I. I see a small opening and weasel my way in, only to find there is a fat chimney blocking my path to go any further. Seven hells.

When i turn around, two guards are peering into my hiding place, and I move to Plan B:

"Good sirs, why on earth are you chasing me?!" I ask with exasperation.

"Orders, miss." He responds. I explain that as a girl who grew up in Flea Bottom, when I hear the words 'arrest them', it is purely instinct to run, but convinced them that I barely know the others in my party, and that I've been running standard errands for the Alchemists for years, that this just seemed like a typical day in my work, had it not been for the loonies ahead of me. Whatever I said worked, because the "brave soldiers" (HA) not only let me pass, but wished me well on my way.

I scurry across the main road, not wanting to draw attention to myself, but as soon as I am tucked into another alley, out of sight of the guards, I break back into a sprint. Bobbing and weaving through the tight passages between buildings, I don't even bother to look at the townspeople or my surroundings. Escape is the only thing on my mind, and I head in the opposite direction of where Teddy was being chased. I'm making good speed until I'm stopped by a stack of barrels blocking the road. The King truly does not anyone milling about.

Frantically, I reach for edge of the top barrel to climb over, leaping again and again. It is only after a few hapless tries  that I realize panic is clouding the solution in front of me. I reach for a lower ledge, hoist myself upon it, and climb to safety.

It is then that I see Teddy, and we agree it must be our top priority to escape the city. Remembering to our entry at the Iron Gate, we hatch a plan to use the information we learned at the Dragon gate to walk out with the permission of the guards…and the "King".

Splitting up the Group??

Down in the tunnels, we decided to heed Ruben's suggestions and to try to hurry on out. We head back to where we met him and decide to take the left where he suggested. We run into a locked door but luckily we have 2 great lock picks! Inside the door we see a ton of wildfire in a layer of sand!! I take a moment to count the jars and there are 300… This must mean that we are under the Dragon Pits as we saw in the note!

We continue on our way and find another room with a myrish crossbow! Dolins grabs it and takes it with him though I was for sure interested… I don't really have many good weapons, not that I would be great at using them… But a girl's gotta protect herself right? We continue on our way and see some sunlight! Finally! We end up in a tack room, but not any tack room! This is tack for dragons! I find some moldy old clothing and suggest we disguise ourselves in this, though the group doesn't love the idea. We decide to just head back towards the sea as soon as possible. So we head towards the king's gate! We walk through the dragon pit towards the huge dragon doors that are closed. Dolins shows incredible strength and opens up the doors! Through the doors we see over the city and decide to head down the hill at our feet as it is the most direct route.

We tie ourselves all together to get down this treacherous hill. It takes us some time and Calaila, Teddy and I stumble quite a bit while our bard keeps us steady! But we finally make it to the bottom! Once we are down there, we notice that many of the people in the town are nervous . We make our way towards the gate but see it's closed! I ask a passing woman and she says that the king ordered them closed as an army is on its way. She states that they are prisoners of their own town!

I see a gold cloak at the door and I start speaking to him. I state that we need to leave the city on pyromancer business. He seems skeptical that I don't have a note from the king for him. He and I go back and forth a few times and he is still unconvinced though I try to tell him the work is too secret to carry a note. I even come up with a story about how a maester was on pyromancer work up north and was killed when found with a note about his business. Dolins jumps in to show his new bow and states that the king gave him this. The guard seems confused at this. Dolins then offers 50 silver from the king to each man for their trouble. At this the guard states that if this came from a king, he wouldn't have offered this amount and he yells at his guards to seize us! Out of the corner of my eye I see Calaila and Teddy sprint off. What wimps! Also, what the heck! Leaving us here?? Dolins then speaks up and states he was mistaken, he has a gold dragon for each of them. At this, the guard appears to listen again. But Calaila and Teddy are long gone…. What friends they are!

It's the climb!
there's always gonna be another mountain...

Heeding the advice of the man in the tunnels, we hurry back to where we found the man, and turn left to find a room with 300 urns of Wildfyre. Our cunning maester correlates this with the note Dolins found, identifying that we may be underneath the Dragon Pits…which made us wonder where the rest of the wildfyre had gone in the first location we found.

We leave the tunnels near the dragon pits, and bicker for a bit about a plan and how to escape the city safely. We step out into into the sunlight, and into the immense structure, and head northeast towards the nearest exit, to the dragon gate. I, still crippled by the fear of running into Tontos again, pull my scarf over my head, and we decide to slowly climb down the Hill of Raenys, and book it towards the gate. When we reach the ground, I can't help but notice a sense of nervousness in the crowded streets. We blend into the hustle and bustle, but find that the Dragon Gate is closed. "The king has ordered all gates closed as a war is coming to our doorsteps," a townsperson shared, and our plan is immediately foiled.

We cannot depend on the incoming armies to recognize us when they sack the city, so we decide to try and escape by convincing the guards to let us go. Unfortunately, this plan does not go as expected, and the next thing we know, we hear "seize them!" and the gold cloaks have turned to Teddy and I. We look at each other for just a moment before tearing into the crowds away from our hunters.

Oh the fun we missed

That poor innkeep! I hurry on over and start helping his bleeding stubby fingers. I hear Dolins shout down what must be the secret cavern telling Calaila it is safe up here. I later hear her voice but she seems to refuse to come out with us… This girl is terrified. That guy wasn't that scary!! We meet with her in the room and as a group, decide we need to head through the tunnels towards the docks if we can find them. I am not fully on board with this, but I'll go along with the group. I need some protection anyways!!

So we head through the vast maze of hallways and doors. Dolins and Teddy take turns unlocking the doors. Most are empty but we happen upon one that has about 50 jars of wildfire in the middle! I warn my friends not to touch them but silly Teddy grabs one and carries it around! We decide which way to head next and Teddy wisely puts his jar back down. In another room, Dolins finds a note that reads "DP 300, GS 500, RK 1000". We deduce that the letters must mean the Dragon Pits, Great Sept and Red Keep. But the numbers, we can only guess at. And we continue on our way!

In another room we oddly find a boat and set of oars. Why they would be down here, we have no idea! As we keep going, Calaila hears someone headed towards us! We all pull out our weapons and see a portly man who we can smell all the way down the hall staring at us. He reeks of wine and old sweat. A poor combination in my opinion! We start talking with the man and he states he is an underguller of the black cells (which is a prison guard of the lowest dungeons of the red keep). He states that he regularly patrols the passages to check on them to see if there are people in them there shouldn't be. Calaila, being a grump, states that he shouldn't really be drinking on the job should he! I am starting to see why she has so many enemies….

He asks who we are, and we state that we are friends of a local merchant and we are trying to get his boat to the port through the tunnels as it wouldn't fit through his front door… I'm not sure this is the most believable tale, but we will go with it! He does not seem to trust us at all so we take him to the boat we found in the other room as proof. He then starts questioning us and gives me a smirk when I tell him who I am. I have no idea what that smirk means… My companions haven't even discovered my secret… How could this random drunk man?

Teddy and Calaila do an excellent job botching their lies to the man. Teddy most of all. We finally ask his name which he states is Ruben. Dolins asks if he understands RK1000 and he states he does and starts to get suspicious. He seems irritated and Dolins repeats the rest of the numbers an indicates that if he understands them, they must understand eachother… Good bluff friend… But will it work?

They continue to go back and forth then Ruben states if we can name the true king, he will tell us where we can find something of great value. I'm sure Calaila's ears perk up at this! Honestly, mine do as well! After the thief stole my money so early on in our adventures, I've become a bit of a greedy Gus! Dolins states that the true king is Robert Barathean and Ruben asks again who we really are. Teddy states he does not believe he is truly a guard and he agrees, he is not. Teddy states he is not of house Redwyne as he had previously stated but that we are of the house Lynderly. Ruben still does not believe us and seems frustrated. Calaila tries to convince him to tell us who he is if we share who we are. He still mistrusts us and leaves us alone in the tunnels. With nothing of great value earned… This maester thinks she should have spoken up…

Tell me sweet little lies
Oh, no, you can't disguise

I hear Dolins faintly calling to me, and momentarily wonder if bringing me back to the Inn could be a cruel trick of Tontos, but when I return,  things appear to be quiet. With nothing but my suspicious eyes poking out from the trap door, Dolins tells me in a hush tone that they lied to get Tontos to leave, and told him that I worked in the Kitchens at Redwyne, and he seems to be heading there now. I tell him that it's clearly not safe for me to return to the streets, and I'm going to escape the city by going through the tunnels. They agree to come with.

The tunnel system is complicated and harrowing, but for most of our journey, we are lucky to only come across easily opened locks and some loot, perhaps most unusually, a row boat with oars. After many hours, we stumble into a man who introduces himself as a Black Cells guard, stinking and portly. Thinking back to our mysterious rowboat, I cheerily announce we are trying to deliver a boat to the water's edge. Clearly not believing us, we are happy to show it to him, and we tussle over the mechanics of how to "deliver it to the water". Unfortunately, this man intends on taking us through the Red Keep. Dolins shocks me when we agrees to the plan, and I panic, knowing that this is surely a path to fire and blood. I confront the man about his story, wondering aloud why he would be so far from the Red Keep if he was a Black Cell guard, when Dolins picks up on the man's slightly shifting facts.

Dolins challenges the man's identity, and asks him what he knows about a paper he found in the tunnels reading letters and numbers which were meaningless to me. The man's tone shifts considerably. "I need to know I can trust you," he repeats again and again, perseverating on his double edged sword of the lies we've told him without recognizing that he has done the same. Even when I offer to share our true identities on the condition he opens up in kind, the man declines, and encourages us to leave quickly and warning of us danger. He suggests we turn left when we go back to way we came, and disappears into the blackness of the tunnels.